The Third Fat Cyclist?

Mike, known to people in West Carmarthenshire as 'Mike Fiver' (do anything for a fiver!), a young 65 year old now enjoying his retirement in Greece is always ready for an adventurous bike ride.

April 1st 2010 he decides on a downhill trip to Kavros and a cyclic flat route that will bring him past the local ice cream shop in Georgeopolis. Known to the locals as Michalis Rowlandakis, the intrepid cyclist sets off, only to remember he has forgotten his hat (most important in case of an accident). Off to go again, only to remember he has forgotten his mobile phone (most important in case of emergencies whether accident or in need of a pick up).


Off to go again, check the mirror, only to remember he hasn't kicked up his stand. There's no need for lycra! There's no need for the water bottle! The 2009 Polar Bear tee will do.

'Right lets get this right', says Rowlandakis, 'the left gear has to go to low selection and the right one to number 1 and I'll get up any hill?'

50 minutes later the mobile is in use. However, it hasn't been charged and is low on power and not picking up a signal. 10 times Fiver desperately tries to get through.

'Hello, Hello, can you hear me?'

He tries the house phone. He tries the mobile. People are running about looking for phones. He hangs up the mpobile, tries the land line again, then back to the mobile and on it goes.

'Hello, Hello, can you hear me?'

The sound of children, music and laughter in the background give his position away and the support vehicle is dispatched to the ice cream shop. 100 metres from aforesaid shop Fiver is found in the hedge desperate for shade to see the screen on his mobile. He had been desperate for a lift. Under interrogation he lets slip he has visited the ice cream shop. 10k of downhill and flat cycling followed by a Greek coffee has finished him off and the 24 gear Sportec is shoved in the boot of the VW and Fiver plants himself in the back of the car and is escorted home to his sun lounger.

Siesta time!